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“Thirst Quencher”

“Thirst Quencher”

The scene ~ Whole Foods, late Sunday morning.

My husband, my kids and I made a quick trip to pick up a bag of veggie puffs or something for our two-year old (he had some at a birthday party yesterday, and for being a non-veggie eater, I figured we’d go get some to have at home).  We don’t really shop there, we’re good with the regular stuff at Lowe’s Foods or Harris Teeter, and the one in our town has the crappiest parking lot EVER.  Poor layout and way to small for the shopping center it is in.  I’ve only been there twice, maybe three times before today.  Once was an initial exploratory trip, and maybe twice to pick up lunch for my former employer and myself…for those wondering, don’t worry – it was a happy separation, I left work to start a family!  Anyway -

We are puttering through the store, eyeballing all the healthy, organic, sugar-free granola and tree bark flavored items (I’m partially kidding).  The baby is asleep and Matt is rolling him in the stroller while Evan sits in the cart I am pushing.  Matt and I separate for a moment and I go around the front of an isle where a uniquely dressed woman behind a display table asks me if I would like to give my son a sample of juice…here is how it played out:

Sample Lady: Would he like to try a sample of “Just Kids Thirst Quencher”?

Me: No thank you, we don’t give him juice yet.

Sample Lady: It’s not juice, it’s thirst quencher. (She cocks her head and includes a full on “well, aren’t you an idiot” look).

Me: Ohhhhh-kayyyyyyy. (In my head I am saying – ok, Dot…back away slowly…..no sudden movements….she might scare easy….)


Did she seriously correct me and give me a “look”?  Excuse me?  The liquid you’re pushing at me looks like diluted tea – it’s not water, it’s not milk – in my mind it’s juice, right?  Apparently not, it’s THIRST QUENCHER.  Geeeez.  So we finally find that they are out of the veggie puff things and I quickly wheel Evan to the register to purchase the hot tea bags I found (in a flavor not available at my grocery store)…and we head out as fast as possible.  Oy.  Whole Foods may be the big thing, but just not for us.  I’ll just get Evan some animal crackers and be done with it!

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  • Elizabeth

    HAHAHAHAAH I love your storytelling, Dot! Oh wow though, I cannot believe she did that! I love Whole Foods, but goodness I cannot imagine that happening! I’m not sure what I would have done!!

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